2016/12/24

Bottom 100: #54 United Passions


*NOTE:  This intro was written after watching the flick*

Good morning, good afternoon, good evening...whenever it is you are reading this!  I'm back with a new Bottom 100 movie review.  This time the FIFA history flick United Passions.  "Follows the passing of the FIFA baton through three association presidents: Jules Rimet, Joao Havelange, and Sepp Blatter."  It stars Tim Roth, Sam Neill, Fisher Stevens.  As of 12/24/16 it has a 2.0 over on IMDB.
  • Uggg, I'm about to watch a soccer movie...thanks a lot Obama!  (can't say that much longer)
      Wait...this is about FIFA?  Seriously?  Where is The Room when I need it!
    • How does this only have 2 on IMDB?  Who doesn't like a good debate about "football" rules and articles of a League
    • "Only because I was the least drunk"...wish I was drunk right now!
    • At least this flick is only 110 minutes and I'm stuck at work
    • That scene was pointless, we know people used to be racist
    • Honest this is going to be a boring blog because NOTHING of importance is happening.  It is like watching the West Wing but not liking politics!
    • IMDB Trivia:  In Phoenix, AZ, the film grossed $9 in its opening weekend, meaning only one person bought a ticket to see the film.  I hope he got it back!
    • IMDB Trivia:  On June 5, 2015, the film made its North American premiere at 10 movie theaters in New York, Phoenix, Los Angeles, Washington D.C., Kansas City, Miami, Minneapolis, Dallas, Houston, and Philadelphia. It grossed $319.
    • IMDB Trivia:  In an interview with German magazine Der Spiegel, Tim Roth said he only participated in the film because he needed the money.
    • Yes the famous play by play while you watch crowd reactions instead of the action shot.  Used so often in most sports films....wait....was that a little bit of soccer I just saw?
    • Unless you love "Football" history I bet this is a good flick.  However....good grief...this is boring 
    • I will say that Gérard Depardieu had a good performance
    • Wait is the point of these random inserts of kids playing soccer?
    • Wait..Sam Neill is playing a Brazilian?  
    • Nice use of real footage actually
    • Awesome, a shot of Sam swimming...that makes perfect sense!
    • Wow Tim Roth really phoned this performance in!
    • THOSE ARE SOME SHORT SHORTS!  One wrong step and that broadcast would have become x-rated!
    • If this wasn't on the bottom 100 I think I would have stopped a while ago.
    • One good thing about this is it is well shot and thought out but man is the flick boring
    • Nice a Montage, don't get enough of those in none training scenes!
    • Wait...he keeps the key and the safe in the same place?  Next thing you'll tell me his luggage combination is 1-2-3-4-5
    • Well that is the logical end...so why not make it another 10 minutes...oh of course the random kids playing soccer that we've seen all movie.  Lets make it mean something
    Well that was brutally boring!  Seriously that is my opinion of this flick.  I see why this flick only has a 2.0 at IMDB right now.  While the acting was okay to good it almost seemed pointless.  Honestly it was a history lesson in FIFA ignore most of what you think of FIFA and that is the corruption.  It is mentioned at the very end of the flick but that is it.  The trivia that one person saw it in Arizona opening weekend is correct.  IMDB doesn't say how much it made which isn't a good sign.

    This is in the bottom 100 not because it is a bad film, because forst the most part I can't say anything really bad about the flick aside from the boring part I've stressed often.  

    Overall it just wasn't a topic that really translated well to a feature film.  A multi-part special on HBO or Showtime or A&E or History (That would have been ideal) and I could see this being successful. Put it on 6 weeks before the World Cup leading right up to the opening ceremonies and you might have something.  110 minutes in the theater not so much.  I will stick with the average on this one and say 2.0

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