Good morning, good afternoon, good evening, whenever it is you have come across this entry. I am returning the realm of expected bad movies today (9/19/17) as I am checking the 2003 flick House of the Dead. It stars Jonathan Cherry, Tyron Leitso and Clint Howard. "A group of college students travel to a mysterious island to attend a rave, which is soon taken over by bloodthirsty zombies." To quote the late Roddy Piper, sweet baby Jesus, this is a Uwe Boll flick?!?! While I like a few of his films he does not have a good record at all, especially with video game franchises! Well I cannot delay it any longer (which isn't true, I mean it is my choice to punish myself with these bad movies after all). Lets go check out...uggg....House of the Dead!
- You can bet there will be a lot of gore in this flick as Boll loves his gore
- Nice Sega reference....or actually huge product placement
- Does Clint have a hook for a hand?
- Good grief, it starts bad...and we have a Capt. Kirk joke...fantastic
- It is too bad that he is in this flick because Jürgen Prochnow is a good actor. Loved him in the audio book of World War Z, one of my favorite parts
- Takes off her top but not her underwear? Wonder why that would be....I mean besides movie rules
- Pointless boobs underwater shot there
- Probably shouldn't be watching this flick at work
- Matt just disappeared with nothing left behind, not even a struggle, weird
- More toplessness for no reason
- Yes he went into the crypt, I mean why wouldn't someone go into a crypt on a mysterious island graveyard! I love movie logic
- Ah yes now the zombies have found the "rave"
- WTF? Random video game clips?
- They don't find it weird that NO ONE is at this "rave"
- groove to funky tunes?
- Yes more video game clips, can't figure out how this is a bottom 100 flick
- They sound more like beasts then zombies
- There are a lot of video games that could be movies but House of the Dead, a shooter on rails was low down on my list
- Yes, keep filming the entire time
- There are zombies attacking people, you hear someone pounding on the turned over portajohn and you open it?
- These zombies die from body shots? What are the rules of this flick?
- Now they run? And I hate running zombies
- So is Capt Kirk dead?
- Nope there he is...and there he goes :(
- Uggg, the use of shake first person cam is enough to get this in teh bottom 100
- Ah yes, the gearing up scene followed by video game clips
- I think that was actually a zombie out to the game!
- Also they have the Hershal unlimited ammo cheat!
- WTF was that zombie doing?
- Where did the dead find all these melee weapons?
- Why go in the cabin, you seemingly can take them just fine, killing 3 or 4 with one bullet even
- Also these zombies LOVE to jump
- Its a zombie not a T-Rex there Malcolm
- Oh the karate American Flag Wearing girl goes down
- They ate her legs that fast? That is going to get you sick zombies
- So bites don't turn you? Again what are the rules?
- Yes, now is the time to make out...wait...they dead are cleaning up their own?
- More making out as they are near the dead
- Where did they find more ammo?
- He dropped a bullet, that will cost him
- So they were in this house the entire time before and never looked around?
- So these things aren't really zombies as much as undead. I know it seems the same but it isn't!
- Howdy Rudy get in front of everyone?
- I don't think that is how gun powder works, but I can't say for sure
- Yes, follow the weird cloaked person
- Nice, a great skin mask
- Owe loved this 360 cam and slow motion
- Why isn't she bleeding?
- Oh, there is a little blood there
Well that was as bad as I expected. Or what I expected. The 2 on IMDB is perfect for this flick and it all falls on Boll's head. The actors did what they could but when you have a director that goes for sizzle instead of steak this is what you get.
I cannot say anything stuck out as horrible but nothing stood out a good. The writing was bad, the acting at time was bad, it was a glorified stunt show most of the time actually. Zombies jumping and using axes (I know it is in the game) explosions randomly or because why not throw a grande without telling the others.
I can't say to watch this, it is not the kind of bad that it is enjoyable, it is just bad.
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