Alien: resurrection review

Good morning, good afternoon, good evening, whenever it is you've found this entry.  Today we continue our march to forthcoming Alien flick with my thoughts on Alien Resurrection.  It stars Sigourney Weaver, Winona Ryder, Dominique Pinon.  "Two centuries after her death, Ellen Ripley is revived as a powerful human/alien hybrid clone who must continue her war against the aliens."  As of 4/26 it has an IMDB rating for 6.3  Let go see an....Alien Resurrection!

• Wait...are they cloning the alien version of Ripley?  Good grief humans are god damn stupid!
• Why are doctors in the future always so creepy?
• This isn't the best script in the world is it?
• Tamed them?  Really?
• Good grief, are all men pigs in the future too?  
• So in the future people get drunk and watch home shopping?  I guess things aren't that different after all
• What?  She knows about the xenomorph?  How does Call know?  I'm so confused right now
• Why breed more than one?  
• I think the General will be fine...mostly fine
• Running, always running in sci-fi movies.  
• 12?  THE GREW 12 OF THEM!?!?!
• Santa Claus, dealing with alien like creatures, that is just silly talk!

• And people say cloning can go wrong!
• Someone is going to die, strobe light!
• Wait...is she a Ripley clone too?  nope...Android
• Is that just a bunch of them or is that the queen?  Why are the movies always so dark and hard to tell what is happening
• IS THAT XENOMORPH HUMPING HER?!?!
• OH SHIT!  No eggs needed?  Then why take "hostages?"
• New teeth...that is weird

• That doctor is nuts!
• Really?  Damn Isaac Asimov and his stupid rules of not hurting humans
• I think the grandson wants to talk to grandma
• It is like a little kid and doesn't know what it is doing
• They did a good job of making the eyes expressive in the hybrid which is cool

Well that was interesting.  One thing I find interesting about the entire franchise is that each movie stands on its own and is almost completely different than the previous ones.  Part of it is a new creative team each time but it does keep it sort of fresh.

As far as this flick I enjoyed it but I think quite a bit of that is Ron Perlman.  He is so good in the roles he selects.

This was nothing to write home about and I think IMDB users have it right at a 6/10.  Not horrible but not the best of the series either.

Overall more enjoyable than #3 but that doesn't mean much since it was pretty bad.  With it being the end of the series future wise it'll be interesting to see if we ever come back to where this left off or if they'll continue to build up to the #1.

Until next time...Abyssinia!

Movie Review: Chopping Mall

Good morning, good afternoon or good evening, whenever it is you've come across my latest movie review!  Today I'm checking out the 1986 flick "Chopping Mall".  As of 4/15 it has a 5.6 over on IMDB.  It stars Kelli Maroney, Tony O'Dell and Russell Todd.  "Eight teenagers are trapped after hours in a high tech shopping mall and pursued by three murderous security robots out of control."  

• They keep talking about this on Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D
• UGGG, he just said nothing can go wrong...so EVERYTHING will
• Wow the mall was quite different in the 80's!
• This is the 80's at its finest
• So these protector robots are brought to life by the same storm as Johnny 5?

• Traditional 80's boob shot
• Wow the HR department there doesn't mess around with looking at NSFW stuff while on the clock!
• This mall has a locker room for employees?  Awesome!
• Are these robots related to KIT do you think?

• The dialog of this flick is AWESOME!
• Well this party escalated quickly!
• More random 80's boobs!
• Is this too meta?  Showing a bad movie in a bad movie
• YOU'RE THE KING YOU'RE THE KING!  Nice!
• Those are the most ineffective lasers ever!
• Did these things get trained by storm troopers?
• Ah, the flaws of lasers, they can't blast through wood
• These fuckers have C4 explosives?  
• Good thing every sporting store in a mall has automatic weapons!  I LOVE THE 80's!
• Even I can shoot better than these guys and I've never shot before in my life
• Robot blood?

• Read you minds?  Good grief that guy is mentally challenged
• I love it when there is the one character that just screams!
• You could...you know, crawl Susie....never mind that isn't an option anymore
• Stairs, the enemy of the tank treed robot
• However I guess escalators are not!
• Of course the snakes and spiders go right to the girl and climb on her, of course
• I knew that boob flare would come back!
• Why is she crawling?  
• HOLY SHIT!  SHE IS BAD ASS!
• I love modern art
• Why did the paint blow up like that but the propane didn't?

I give this flick a 5/10, only because it had some REALLY bad dialog, like bad for the 80's.  I will say the sound track however almost made up for it.  It was exactly what you'd expect from a horror action flick with robots from the 80's.

This flick is so 80's it hurt to be honest.  From the music to the clothes to the dialog and everything in between.  If you are wondering what the 80's were like this explains it...minus the killer robots...most of the time.  

If you're bored and want to check out a great 80's flick check this out!  Until next time....

Top 250 Movie Review: Aliens

Good morning, good afternoon, good evening, whenever it is you've come to find this entry!  Tonight I'm looking at another top 250 flick, this time #66, Aliens.  It stars Sigourney Weaver, Michael Biehn and Carrie Henn.  "The moon from Alien (1979) has been colonized, but contact is lost. This time, the rescue team has impressive firepower, but will it be enough?"

• 2.5 hours?  That is a long time for a horror/thriller
• This is why aliens will hate us, that thing looks like a gun!
• What the hell is Paul Reiser doing in this flick?
• His hair is awesome!
• Oh it was a dream, that is sad
• They still use dot-matrix printers in the future?  That is...weird
• Weaver does a good job at "angry"
• What did they do with the ship should be the next question Ripley
• Ugg, this flick is too dark at times too
• First its all fun and games then it is running and screaming and dying.  Malcom was right all along!
• I don't like the short hair
• Lots of smoking in the future too, must make safe cigs
• Even the ships in the future look like guns, whats up with that?
• Paxton plays a good "grunt" 
• Again in the future they use a lot of "strobe" lights
• Everyone is dead, nuke the planet and be done with it!
• Are they looking at a hive or a nest of some kind?
• Funny how the Predator and Alien nests look very similar
• Was that a body?
• Marine or not I'd be like "Fuck this"
• Well that nuclear explosion thing is sounding good
• That car thingy looks a little bit like the batmobile 
• I wonder if we will ever find out why they are so aggressive toward others
• Finally a few people talking with logic.  Ripley and Hudson
• Why would they sit there with the ramp down?  That doesn't make sense
• That isn't Spunkmeyer sunshine
• YES!  THERE WAS THE LINE!  MOSTLY!
• Is that a microfiche machine?
• Of course it was the "companies" fault
• Do people not watch movies in the future?  Of course you're going to run into one Burke!
• Leave the kid, it is too late for her.  Nuke the place!
• I still don't trust Bishop
• Ah we're playing Dead Rising now, making weapons with other weapons and duct tape
• Ah yes there is the steam that we always get in Sci-Fi flicks especially Alien flicks
• Its like the slurm queen on Futurama!
• Do they talk telepathically?
• Did Queeny just rip off her own reproductive organ?
• This movie is a little drawn out but not horrible for 2.5 hours
• I knew not to trust Bishop!  
• Queeny went down awful easily....
• HERES QUEENY!  
• Queeny moves weird, like a retarded T-Rex
• Why does Queeny want that little girl so bad?
• Why is James Cameron so obsessed with Exosuits
• I really like the lack of music here at the end, makes it much more intense
• This is why I never tie my shoes
• Mommy?

Well that was interesting.  Part of me liked this one more than the first.  I felt it was more of a "story" than just random violence and action.  That isn't that the first was bad but it was dark and not a lot of story.

Overall I give the flick an 8/10.  Slight above average for me but nothing amazing. 

Movie Review: Dahmer (2002)

Good morning, good afternoon, good evening, whenever it is you've come across this entry.  Today I'm looking at the 2002 flick Dahmer.  As of 4/7 on IMDB it has a rating of 5.6.  It stars Jeremy Renner, Bruce Davison and Artel Great.  "Biopic about notorious American serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer, taking place in both the past and the present."

• SHIELD sure did pull Hawkeye out of nowhere didn't they!
• Does that haircut make people become a creeper?
• What kind of pictures?  Really?
• Does this kid not know how much a photoshoot is worth?  At least two pair of shoes and maybe even some socks too!
• That is a horrible picture, your belt would be in the way Jeffrey!
• Poor kid lost his new shoes
• I'd probably wait longer then 30 seconds after the cops left to strangle the kid
• Ah the crazy Grandma made him do it, all makes sense now
• Having a mannequin in the closet is very strange
• Why is he talking so weird to his dad?
• Human head in a box, seems so obvious at this point
• Why don't you marry fish then buddy!
• Are gay bars are really like they show in the movies
• Why drug the guys, I mean I think they're all there for the same thing
• That was a horrible fake punch
• What is wrong with this kid and his obsession with fish?
• Does he smoke his cig weird or is just me?
• Wait, how old was this woman the kid almost got with?  
• That isn't just kind of gross, it is very gross!
• This flick is all over the place time wise
• Always the crawl space!
• Forever?  Its been a couple of hours kid
• He didn't fight very much to be honest

I'm not sure what to say about this flick.  It wasn't bad but I feel like it left a lot to be said/done.  They ended it with a notice about what happened to Jeffery but we didn't see him caught or anything so I feel like it was a chapter of a story but not the entire thing.  That is the biggest complaint I'd have with the flick.

The acting is what it is.  Nothing great but nothing that stood out as poor either.  Same goes for the entire flick really.  It was just there for me.  Nothing bad but nothing great.  I'd give it a 6/10. Honestly overall I felt it was uninspired.  That everyone was kind of just phoning the flick in.

I can't say to watch it but can't say to avoid it either.  It just kind of felt "there" for me.  

Top 250 Review: Alien

Good morning, good afternoon, good evening...whenever it is you've come across this post.  Today I'm checking out the 1979 flick Alien.  Currently it is #51 on the top 250 with a 8.5 as for 4/3.  It stars Sigourney Weaver, Tom Skerritt and John Hurt.  "After a space merchant vessel perceives an unknown transmission as distress call, their landing on the source moon finds one of the crew attacked by a mysterious life-form, and soon realize that its life cycle has merely begun."

(Note these comments start about half way through the flick, after the facehugger but before the chest bursting scene)

• Why do people in the future always go investigate things?  
• So the woman and the black guy are the smart ones while the white guys are dumb?
• This is why we can never go into space!
• We, as humans, are way to curious for our own good
• We have movies like this. The first alien I see is going to get shot in the face before it can attach to my face or turn me into a borg!
• Good grief look how young these people are!  I realize it is 37 years ago but wow!
• Yep, make sure you touch the creepy looking egg like things, nothing bad can happen there!
• That didn't look like he slipped and fell, more like he just slid down 
• That net is going to help any Parker, I'd get a gun...with lots of bullets
• I love the lighting in this flick, it is awesome.  Also the confined feeling is awesome
• It is going to be the cat right?  Yep it was the cat
• Goodbye Brett, we'll see you being creepy looking in your next flick
• Could the designers of the ship (in the movie world) make it any less creepy?
• They do a wonderful job of building the tension
• I think the Governor is in this room chasing Andrea...with the cat...either way you lock the door and get out
• Yes, fire in an inclosed space, this can't be wrong
• Wait...they are crawling INTO the ducts?  Do people get dumber in the future?
• That was anti-climatic for Dallas to fall that way
• I'd just get on that escape pod/shuttle and I'd be out of there
• Parker is off on his own because he is stubborn
• Of course its the damn "government" that called for the thing to be brought back alive
• Is he going to choke her out with a porn mag?  I know of choking other thing while having a porn mag but never that!
• She is worried about the damn cat!
• Why are the coolant containers in such bottles?
• Does Ripley not hear that horrible sound?  You know the sound of death as she walked into that area
• Why care about blowing up the ship, just get the hell out!
• Assume they're dead and leave, its the only logical thing to do!
• Could there be a more elaborate self destruct function?
• Why does the alien hate the cat?  Is it a dog alien?
• Wait...why is she trying to stop the self destruct?  Did I miss something?
• They freeze the cat too?!  I mean it makes sense I'm just surprised for some reason
• Lots of strobe lights in the future on space ships apparently
• How does it move so slow yet so fast?
• Is her plan to vent the oxygen?  If so brilliant idea!

Well that was pretty good.  I can see why it is in the top 250 for sure.  I'd give an 8/10.  It is slightly slow compared to most movies and that is a good thing.  As I said before it builds itself up so well and each time you go a little higher and come down slightly higher so the rollercoaster continues.  

I personally had a hard time understanding a few times and had to turn on subtitles but that could just be my bad hearing. 

I also had a hard time seeing the alien at times which might have been the point but it bothered me a bit to not see exactly what was going on, especially to Parker.

Overall I enjoyed the flick.  If you haven't seen it check it out.  If you have remember the next one in the series comes out this year so check it out again!