Movie Review: Dunkirk

Good morning, good afternoon, good evening...whenever it is you have come across this entry.  Today, 1/20/18, I am checking out the flick Dunkirk.  It stars Fionn Whitehead, Barry Keoghan and Mark Rylance.  "Allied soldiers from Belgium, the British Empire and France are surrounded by the German Army, and evacuated during a fierce battle in World War II."  It currently has a 8.1/10 with

320,700 votes.

• How does he know that water wasn't poisoned and left for them to drink
• Probably should get out from behind the WOOD door kid
• Its his own people?  
• I hate to say it but yeah running is probably the best choice
• Digging his own grave?  Nope...covering up a dead body after stealing the boots
• Yeah, everyone on the beach seemed like a bad idea...and this is why...bombers
• That actually did a lot less damage then I would have expected
• They look like twins running 
• Those life jackets won't do any good against a U-Boat boys and girls
• I think I'd stay on the beach personally...but then again they have them against their backs and the sea in front of them...not good odds
• Why does Nolan have to use such weird shots in most of his flicks?  Odd camera angles and what not
• Lots of good actors in this flick which isn't suprising
• Sitting ducks on the bridge and boats
• Did a good job of locking the door with no noise
• Fuck you'd have no idea where to go, underwater, dark, in a ship you don't know....the thing of nightmares!
• Scarecrow does NOT want to go back no matter what!
• Jesus...what a waste of life!
• War...war never changes
• I don't think I'd get in another boat....
• Don't they realize they're the only civilian boat we've seen thus far?
• Talk about fish in a barrel!
• Use the gun and shoot son or you are going to drown
• How could you live with it?  
• Nope not the only civilians coming to help
• An amazing story!
• Is it bad for a ship to get into oil?  
• Poor Georgie....never let your name be Georgie in a flick I guess
• I wouldn't have told Scarecrow Georgie would be okay.  I think I'd probably have thrown him overboard after bashing his head in
• No answer to the soldier asking if they let everyone down...that says a lot without saying anything

Well that was an amazing flick and part of me wishes I had seen it in the theaters.  The acting was amazing, which is not surprising looking at the cast.  Visually it was not Saving Private Ryan but it was right up there.  If you take out the weird camera angles during the dog fights and it was almost perfect.

Honestly I cannot come up with much to say bad about the flick.  The weird camera angles that Nolan does often and I hate not knowing what happened to Tom Hardy.  I know it is not a true story but based on one but I hate not knowing.

I would suggest anyone who likes a good story or a good movie to check this out.  I give it a 9/10.  One of the best flicks I have seen in a while.

Movie Review: Wonder Woman

Good morning, good afternoon, good evening....whenever it is you have come across this entry. Today I'm writing about the new flick "Wonder Woman".  I'm not feeling 100% so no description of what the flick is about, look it up if you have been in some cave and don't know!

Overall the movie was a thumbs in the middle for me.  A 6.5/10

I enjoyed the story of the film for the most part but like most DCEU flicks this one just felt a little flat for me.  It might be because of the high bar that Marvel has set or that that the DC TV Universe has set.  I always fail to see how DC can produce some of my favorite TV shows (Batman The Animated Series; Justice League; Arrow; Flash) yet their movies more often than not leave me feeling blah.

It might be the creative team lead by Snyder but I'm not 100% sure of that.  It might be casting (more on that to come) I'm not sure but something seems to be off with their formula.

Much like last years Batman v. Superman this flick continues us on the path toward Justice League which looks to be more and more like a train wreck that we won't be able to look away from.  Lets get more into Wonder Woman though.

The biggest thing for me in this flick was that the writing was BAD!  I mean corny bad.  The part where Dr. Poison basically looks into the camera and says "and it will be terrible" literally made me sigh and shake my head.  There were other examples too but overall the writing drug this film down for me.

Another thing that hurt this flick was that it was nearly 2.5 hours long!  IT IS LONG AND FEELS IT!  Why?  Because every time Diana turns to fight someone else you get a slow or stop motion shot. I swear to god you could cut 20 minutes off this flick if you got rid of all those.

Lastly the CG in several parts of this flick was lacking.  Several times it looked like a video game and not in a good way.

While I didn't love her I didn't hate Gal in the starring role.  I'm still not sold as her as Wonder Woman but I didn't hate it.  She does a decent job in the role but I failed to completely feel she was "Wonder Woman" at times.  Too many superhero poses and close ups (which you can't blame her for) ruined it a bit for me as did her "trying to look tough" look that came off, in my opinion, as "look at me I'm tough" like young Diana did.

That isn't to say I hated everything.  This was the first time I liked Chris Pine and the young lady who played his secretary was wonderful in her role.

Honestly what hurt this flick for me was all behind the camera/off screen.  Bad writing, bad directing (at times), bad writing, bad CG, bad writing (did I mention that yet), bad editing and a few plot holes hurt this more than anything the actors did.

The actors did the best with what they were given and that alone I applaud them.  They were given a mix of chicken, chicken byproducts, feathers and a little bit of shit and told to make sure believe it was chicken salad.  If I closed my eyes really tight and didn't chew a lot I bought it!

Again I'd say a 6.5/10 but due to nothing the actors did.  A better writing team and perhaps a director who could not use the same gimmick each time (if it was her fault, it could have been a studio or editor decision) and this could have been higher.

I've seen it compared to the first Thor which I also gave a 6 for some of the same reasons.

Worth going to see if you enjoy superhero movies that is for sure.  It isn't a home run but a solid standing double/sliding triple if you will excuse the baseball analogy.  It is the best DC flick since The Dark Knight but I'm not sure if that is a good or a bad thing!

Movie Review: Alien: Covenant

Good morning, good afternoon, good evening...whenever it is you have found this entry.  I am back, a day later than I wanted to be, to give you my thoughts on the new Alien Convent flick.  Lets start with the UGLY

THE UGLY

• Some of the acting was just not good.  Billy Crudup and Demián Bichir are the two that stood out for me.  I thought both performances left a lot of things to be desired.  Crudup seemed to be phoning in his performance and I just didn't like Demian at all.  

THE BAD

• The story is getting a little old at times.  The whole alien attacks and people freak out thing is getting slightly old.  While they do a good job of keeping the story more than just alien attacking, which is a good thing, I am starting to get tired of the basic concept.  Maybe it is because I watched them all recently, but it is slightly old
• This came up in AVPR storyline a bit but the timeline/universe is kind of muddy remember what has happened, what hasn't happened and what didn't actually happen.  
• It felt a little bit like a middle flick

THE GOOD

• I never thought I'd say this but the acting of Danny McBride was very well done.  While I usually find him overbearing he was amazing!
• Katherine Waterston and Michael Fessbender were fantastic as well.  Michael was easy the star of the flick even if he wasn't suppose to.
• While I know I mentioned the story as a bad, the actual storyline of the flick was fantastic and actually answered some questions I've had since the first flick.  So that was nice.  While it is a little convoluted the story structure was well done 

Overall a very good film that I'd give a 7/10 which is what IMDB has right now.  It felt slightly drawn out at times and I'd like to see it cut maybe 10-15 minutes out but nothing that made me want to pull my hair out.  A good flick and probably worth paying the theater prices but not needed.  I don't think you would lose anything by waiting assuming you aren't a 13 inch TV.

Until next time...ABYSSINIA!

Movie Review: The Maze Runner

Good morning, afternoon or evening, whenever you're reading this wonderful amazingly written blog!  This time I'm watching The Maze Runner from 2014. Over on IMDB it has a rating of 6.8 as of 9/10.  "Thomas is deposited in a community of boys after his memory is erased, soon learning they're all trapped in a maze that will require him to join forces with fellow "runners" for a shot at escape." It stars Dylan O'Brien, Kaya Scodelario and Will Poulter.  Enough of the introduction, on to the show!

• Can they make a movie that isn't two hours or longer anymore?  I don't know if I'm ready for a 2 hours flick
• Puking right off the bat....not want I wanted to see to start a flick
• Wow this kid is freaking out....should I know what is going on....awe shit...he is going to get fucked up!
• They put him in the cage for two minute?  POINTLESS!
• I guess this is how it feels to be a "greeny" because I'm confused as shit right now
• Okay this is some Lords of the Fly shit going on here
• Exile?  From a sting?  Man the Tracker Jackers in this movie are pretty hardcore!
• The Maze is changing shape every night, why try to escape?  Why do what "they" want you to do?  
• All in this together?  Some odd brotherhood thing?  I don't trust any group that openingly takes anyone and everyone in.
• How long until the token fat kid dies?
• Wait...why did he do that?  He didn't think that through did he
• I feel like this is a Hunger Games type story that I like the concept but will hate the execution
• Is that a robot?  A Skitter?  Both?
• The Maze is 3D?  Interesting
• They made that bug go splat
• He is the One!
• Greaver?  Not Reaver?
• Breeding stock....what?  Why else send a girl...oh right because you've got to have a powerful girl and a love story
• Here comes the jump scare boys and girls
• Its a cyborg
• This kid who saved the Doctor better wish the Doctor comes and saves them!  He may be like fire and ice and rage. He's like the night, and the storm in the heart of the sun. He's ancient and forever but these kids are morons
• How old are these kids suppose to be?  They all seem to be the same age, or mostly the same
• I'll be honest, this movie is moving along quickly, although nothing has really happened...its odd
• Yes hide right by the torchligh
• Pretty sturdy roof on that hut
• I think I'd go out and fight rather than hide and die...but I say that because I don't have to make the choice.  In all reality I'm the fat kid who would end up dying right at the end, the last one to fall
• Never break formation boys and girls, it almost always gets you or someone you care about killed
• Why suicide instead of fighting the attackers?  Take one or two out with you
• Oh no....

Well I didn't care for the ending but over all not a bad flick.  For two hours it went by fast.

Pros:

• It went by fast and didn't drag.  
• I felt like I was thrown in the deep in there at the beginning but the more I think about the more I like it.
• For all younger actors I felt like they did a decent to really good job
• Visually it was an excellent flick for the most part....

Cons:

• The greaver design was bad as of now.  No reason behind it being a cyborg slug thing.  Perhaps the design will be explained at a later date as there is at least one more movie and I think two more books
• The ending I didn't like.  I guess if you read the books you knew what was coming but it should have ended with the helicopter taking off and the one guy saying everything was going to change or what not.  You can have Ava stand up in the second movie or her show up and stun Tommy later on (if it ends up being his mom I swear I'll break something)
• The introduction of Theresa felt pointless.  Why do it?  He doesn't remember her and she doesn't remember him.  She isn't super-powered or awesome or building a love story or anything.  I don't get the point of introducing her at this point.  Again I haven't read the books and have no clue where it is going so perhaps that will change but as of right now it makes no sense.  
• I don't know how Gally gets to the control room.  It makes no sense.  Hopefully that is explained later on

I guess I give it a 6/10 so slightly behind the IMDB score.  I enjoyed it enough to suggest people checking it out.  I will be checking out the second flick in a few weeks when it comes out.  Next time we'll check out the Crackle Original Dead Rising Watchtower, which I just clicked through and I didn't see any zombies...I might be very disappointed in this one boys and girls!  Until then...please check out my Amazon Store for all your shopping needs and if you have a favorite flick you'd like me to watch or review let me know!  As always...Abyssinia! 

Valkryie

This time I am going to review the 2008 flick Valkyrie, which can be purchased from Amazon by clicking here.  It stars Tom Cruise, Bill Nighy, Carice van Houten.  "A dramatization of the 20 July assassination and political coup plot by desperate renegade German Army officers against Hitler during World War II."  As always, you'll see my thoughts as the flick plays then some comments after that might contain spoilers.  As of 7/29 it has an IMDB rating of 7.1

• An oath about swearing allegiance to someone/thing....that is odd!  Who would do such a thing?
• Wait...this is about killing Hilter...to save lives not to take power?  Huh...not what I thought 
• And Tom Cruise just became the Drew Barrymore of this film....wait....maybe not
• I know Hitler studied the occult but did he really promote a teacher from Hogwarts to Major-General?
• Uggg, those kids are annoying
• What is with Cruises hair?  It is awful
• Why have I become obsessed with actors hair recently?
• These guys sure aren't very hidden, they are pretty open about their attempted coup
• Did that guy have a British accent?
• Wow...that is quite the soft version of Hitler
• Was that guy Italian?  Sure looked like he was part of the mob!  That he was going to make me an offer I couldn't refuse
• This whole thing is very awkward
• This is strangely much more boring then I had anticipated.  
• I know it is a "true" story but a lot less spy-ish then I thought it would be
• Was that Brock Lesnar driving them to the bunker?
• Wait...THAT IS EDDIE IZZARD?!?  The Fat Stephen Colbert?!  WOW!
• I expected Hitler to more...well insane
• This is the worst game of telephone ever!
• Why the weird look between Claus and Hitler?  
• The driver looks like a shrunk down version of Lesnar, right down to the angry look!
• Nice to see Danny Webb show up, he is an underrated performer
• District 13?  So it was the Nazi's fault the Hunger Games began?  
• Too Soon?
• A lot of German writing in this movie for some reason....
• Harvey Friedman is a weaselly looking guy!  Probably a perfect Goebbels

Honestly I don't know what to think about this movie.  I know it is historically accurate but the flick itself is slow and probably could have been cut down some.  The scene with the family did little to advance the plot other then to give Cruises character a further reason to want to eliminate Hitler.  The rather drawn out portion of gathering the districts as well could have been cut down.  

As for the subject of the film what can you say?  

I'd give the flick a 6/10.  The pacing was just a little off.  The acting was good to very good but there was no standout performances.  Visually it was average as well.  So I gave it a slightly above average rating because there were a few above average performances and nothing made me cringe or the like.  honestly the one drawback was the pacing of the film.  I feel like there were just a few too many stutter steps for its own good.  

A decent film but I'd like to see 10-15 minutes shaved off the film personally.  Until next time, remember, the odds are never in your favor...and Abyssinia!

Space Milkshake: A Movie Review

This review is for Space Milkshake, a 2012 flick starring Kristin Kreuk, Amanda Tapping, George Takei.  It is currently, as of 7/18, rated as a 7.6 on IMDB.  Here are my thoughts as I watched the flick!

• Well the acting 5 minutes into this flick aren't doing anything to encourage me about the flick
• I will say the effects aren't horrible but the script is awful!
• I swear I jinx myself every time I say something like that.  The effects got to udder shit
• Can't say this is good or bad...just weird thus far.  I can't tell if I should be taking it seriously or more as a joke.  So confused.
• I have no idea how to take this flick, none at all.  
• This movie is just here.  It isn't bad but it isn't good either.  I have no idea what to say about this film.  This will be the worst review ever!
• I suddenly want to sing the Rubber Ducky song from Sesame Street.
• I'm still confused by this movie.  Plastic knifes as weapons, the sandwiches.  the weird alien thing.  
• I've never wanted to be Wendi as much as I do right now
• Wow it squeaks like a rubber ducky!
• Possibly the worst looking space suits in the history of space suits!

So first off I guess I'll give it my rating.  I give it a 4/10.  I have no idea what this flick was suppose to be.  A comedy?  A serious sci-fi flick?  A spoof?  It seemed to be all of those yet none of them.  I don't think I laughed once but I couldn't take it serious because of Billy Boyd's character who seemed to be a spoof character.  It was a case of trying to do too much but not doing any of them well.  I was expecting a "good" bad movie.  Instead I just a blah movie that honestly I was disappointed with. How it is a 7.6 on IMDB is beyond me.  It has to be because of the stars and not the flick.  

There you go.  For once I'm going to say don't bother with this flick personally.  

Ant Man or a non-Marvel Marvel movie

Last night and went out and saw the newest Marvel Universe flick Ant-Man starring Paul Rudd, Michael Douglas and Corey Stoll.  Right now, as of 7/19 IMDB has it rated at 8.1.  I'd give it a 7 personally.  I will say that Michael Peña was probably the best part of the flick.  He is an extremely underrated actor who is amazing in everything I've seen him in.

Here goes, there will be spoilers from here on out so you've been warned.  The flick itself didn't feel like a Marvel flick.  It felt more like mix between Anchor Man and Shaun of the Dead...oh wait because both of the writers worked on this.  I didn't realize Anchor Man author Adam McKay worked on it till writing this.  However some of the jokes had McKay written all over them....horrible pun not intended.

Oh and let me say that I hated Evangeline Lilly hair throughout the movie.  HATED IT!  I was distracted by her hair throughout the film.  Don't know why but it bugged me.

There were a few things I disliked about the flicked.  I felt that Scott Lang (Rudd) accepted the entire thing way too quickly.  I felt that Pym (Douglas) accepted the idea of using a convicted felon way to quickly.  I realize it is a movie and you only have so much time for back story and what not but I didn't like that.  Also I didn't like that they don't mention Howard Stark and Peggy Carter by name in the film.  I saw Carter and thought it was her but didn't think they would just drop her in the film and not atleast say her name.  I had no idea it was Stark till looking at IMDB.  I guess I had to remember seeing him in Iron Man 2 to know it was Stark as it was the same actor.  Slightly disappointed that I had to remember a movie from five years ago to know the characters.  I guess I'm not a big enough fan to remember every actor in every Marvel flick ever!

For the most part that is what I disliked.  A few little things.  I really liked the effects, which are always top notch in Marvel flicks.  However I did feel like I was watching Honey I Shrunk the Kids a few times.  Judy Greer and Abby Ryder Fortson, Lang's ex and his daughter, were really good in their roles and I didn't hate a child actor for once.

There was an Avengers tie in and I like that Lang mentioned calling the Avengers at one point. There is of course a post credit scene that confuses me a bit.  I won't say much about it other then Captain America makes a surprise appearance along with his former friend Bucky Barnes.  But it makes little sense to me right now because I don't have a time frame for it.  It is obviously after Winter Soldier but I don't know if it is after Age of Ultron and if this is setting up Civil War.  Does it take place DURING Civil War?  So that is interesting.

It was an interesting film but I didn't feel like it was a Marvel film.  It felt different and I don't mean that in a bad way.  Guardians of the Galaxy was the same way but this felt even further out there and I don't know if that is a good thing or not.

I'd say go see this flick if you're a Marvel fan or not.  There are a lot of good laughs, lets be honest Paul Rudd is a great actor, and some good action.

There you go, yet another movie review.  Hope you're enjoying these and if you have a movie you'd like to see me review let me know in the comments.  Until next time...abyssinia!!

Rise of the Zombies movie review

I picked up Rises of the Zombies at Walmart for 5 bucks and here are my thoughts as I watched it.  (It might contain spoilers) [Also I would link to Amazon but it Out of Stock because it is either that good or even they have given up on it]

• A lot of action to start the film and a cool effect to show people turning from human to zombie.  IMDB says its a TV movie but about 10 minutes in and I am impressed thus far
• Some of the acting is pretty bad, LaVer thus far has actually been the worst
• While the zombie makeup isn't the best I am still impressed after some of the other TV zombie movies that SyFy have put out
• It is interesting that they have take a few things from the Romero films and expanded on them, still not down on the flick yet but not overly impressed either
• Mariel Hemingway is not impressive thus far either
• The characters seem to be very one dimensional and the typical for a zombie flick.  The doctor who wants to find a cure.  The army/hard ass guy.  The military guy who just wants people to survive.  The old person.  Things like that
• The writing is bad, bad like the book I'm writing.
• Danny Trejo is bad.  I don't blame him it is the script and the poor
• Why does every zombie flick have the person who believes the zombies can be cured
• It is interesting that the zombies seem to be dormant till they sense pray, much like the Walking Dead
• Wow a one arm zombie just took out half the group.  They should be ashamed 
• A chainsaw, interesting, a zombie video game staple but not in movies as much
• Okay zombies that can climb the Golden Gate Bridge?  That is goofy even for zombie movie standards
• I haven't shot a shotgun but the way Hemingway carries and shots it is horrible.  The director should be ashamed of themselves
• Ethan Suplee is the best part of the flick so far.  His soft military guy is believable.  I've always liked him
• There are a lot of things in this flick that are like the Walking Dead, I assume it is because they are standard zombie ideas....YES!  ZOMBIE BABY!!
• Possibly zombie monkeys next!
• Interesting usage of God vs. Science
• There is now a dog in the group!  I like dogs
• Now there is a preggo chick?  Gotta get all the cliches in there
• Strange the evacuation zone is not safe, that is a shocker
• Good grief!  This scene is uncalled for!  Way over the top and I don't think anyone could do it honestly.  Wow that was gross
• How do zombies always just show up with no warning?  How do they not hear them coming?
• Still not disappointed with this film.  It isn't Romero or Snyder but for TV I am impressed actually
• Disappointed with a zombies some, just the way they behave in the background
• Interesting the one girl gives up.  The first time in the flick that I've been disappointed with the CGI.  I haven't seen Heather Hemmens in anything but I'm impressed with her
• In a matter of two minutes the two worst effects
• Really sneaky zombies in this flick
• Nice use of water and electricity.  It is like Bioshock and an interesting way to kill or at least neutralize the zombies
• Yes a crazy scientist.  All of the stereotypes are represented now!
• They just Hershel'ed Suplee's arm! 

That wasn't nearly as bad as I was expecting!  A few of the effects were poor but it was a TV movie.  The acting and script wasn't great but again it wasn't the Walking Dead or Romero.  For 5 bucks I don't feel ripped off at all and I am actually glad I picked it up.  Suplee and Hemmens were both good in their roles I thought.  A basic plot and very by the book character and script wise but I enjoyed it.  I'd say average, a 2.75 out of 5.  

I don't know if anyone reads these but if you do let me know what you think of this "live" type recap of my thoughts.  Do you like it better than the old recap?