Critters Attack: A Hungry Movie Review

Good morning, good afternoon, good evening...whenever it is you have found this entry.  Tonight, 2020-04-17, I finally got around to checking out last years Critters Attack flick.  This series is really the only horror series to give me constant nightmares, occasionally to this day.  Something about those furballs with blood-red eyes that get to me still!  Currently, it has 3.7/10 on IMDB with
1,527 votes.  I know Dee Wallace is back as her character from the first flick and that is about it so enough talk, I am hungry as a crite for more critters!!

• Apparently, this is a TV movie and that makes a little sad
• Starting off with the old horror trope of tripping when running away nice
• Of course, the cop is a jerk
• Why is the cop keeping his booze in a flask in his own home?
• A buffet for ALF!
• Really overpowering music thus far in the flick
• Mmmm, sushi
• Outdoor Dougie....good grief!
• What college has a security gate?
• Cassette?  Who the fuck makes and still has a cassette player?  When is this suppose to take place?
• Who knows the words to a college fight song?
• Who tells random strangers their life stories?
• Good grief this girl is more awkward than the gatekeeper
• Is that Outdoor Dougie?
• Or Backpack Doug as IMDB calls him
• The sound mixing is really bad on this flick
• So they are like Aliens now that they lay their eggs inside people, interesting
• They also now sound like Predators, weird
• They did a good job of making the crites look the same creepy way they did before
• So they just looked confused until attacked, look at them, they are creepy looking, assume they want to kill you, I would
• I cannot believe the same writer who wrote this also did Happy Death Day, which was actually well written
• The dialogue is awful in this flick, like TV movie bad....oh wait yeah it is
• Was it a baby crite?
• Oh, of course, it will be the one good crite
• Yeah...probably not a good idea to go to the ranger station
• Did they use the same models from the 2nd flick?  That was the bald one right?
• OH MY THE WIFI IS DOWN!
• Is the power out too?
• Oh shit, Aunt Dee has a PKE meter for Crites!
• So no one in towns knows Aunt Dee's story?
• Or of the town that was attacked by aliens twice?
• Wait sirens make the crites explode now?
• How are you going to be back?  
• Holy Shit there are hundreds of them 
• He is twelve?  Really?
• They have not shot anyone with their quills yet
• Also, how is Aunt Dee missing all this?
• A lot of walking for an alien outbreak
• He has to take his shirt off to run incredibly fast?
• "Its the Monster Ball" -Selena
• Really they brought the giant critter ball back?
• This is not a good pep talk Drea
• If this vans a rocking that means we are a eatin
• So they saw a giant ball of them eat a guy completely and they are going to stop and fight?
• Did they forget how to shoot quills?
• Did she just bitch slap that crite?
• What was the point of having Aunt Dee in this flick?
• The Queen?  Is she going to kill Bianca?
• When did Aunt Dee become a Bounty Hunter?  Why not just have drunk Charlie do it
• Also, where is the main bounty hunter guy, he should be here.  I need Jean Valjean in this flick!
• So the quills do nothing in this flick
• Why wait to start shooting?

Well, that was a movie for sure.  I give it a 5/10  I feel like it was the victim of really bad editing.  It had the groundwork of a good flick.  The story of an invasion and the queen coming to stop them is not bad.  You also had the story of the kids fighting to stay alive and tell everyone.  But you had the weird sushi storyline that went nowhere and the Uncle blamed himself storyline that just did not fit.  Overall if you like the Critters flicks you have to watch this one.  If you want an okay flick this is not a bad way to spend 90 minutes, plus it was better than #4!  I would be interested in hearing a directors commentary on some of the choices made for sure.  Oh, I forgot to say the main acting from the core group of young people was really good!  Drea especially considering some of the dialog was not great.